When Love Came Down to Earth

This has song has become one of my favorite songs. We recently sang it at church alongside a sermon talking about God's love for us. I remember our pastor making the point that Christmas reminds us that God loves us'. Immediately my reaction was, "Not this year". I didn't feel loved and in fact Christmas was a reminder of how much life sucked right now. It was hard to enjoy any Christmas activities like making cookies, watching movies, decorating, listening to Christmas music, etc. But I have come to realize that all of these things that were not enjoyable this year were all superficial things that had nothing to do with Christmas anyways. It was not the most wonderful time of the year and we were not having a holly jolly Christmas. Those things were conditional. But what is true is that a savior was born to bring hope and restore peace between God and us.

Although life doesn't feel merry and bright, I can agree that Christmas is about God's love for us and the joy, peace, hope, and help Christ's birth provides.


"When love came down to earth
And made His home with men,
The hopeless found a hope,
The sinner found a friend.
Not to the powerful
But to the poor He came,
And humble, hungry hearts
Were satisfied again.

What joy, what peace has come to us!
What hope, what help, what love!

When every unclean thought,
And every sinful deed
Was scourged upon His back
And hammered through His feet.
The Innocent is cursed,
The guilty are released;
The punishment of God
On God has brought me peace.

What joy, what peace has come to us!
What hope, what help, what love!

Come lay your heavy load
Down at the Master’s feet;
Your shame will be removed,
Your joy will be complete.
Come crucify your pride,
And enter as a child;
For those who bow down low
He’ll lift up to His side.

What joy, what peace has come to us!
What hope, what help, what love!"

Liam's No Good Very Bad Day

Where to start. Yesterday Liam just fell apart on us. To start off, he woke up at 5:45 am. We know that he as been teething so he's been more fussy than usual. Yesterday was Evan's Birthday so we drove up to my mom's to spend a couple of days with them. When we got to their place it was around Liam's nap time, but he wouldn't go down without a fight. He cried and cried as we tried to put him down. Finally my mom and I just put him down (still crying) and walked out of the room. We just closed the door when we heard a thud followed by more crying. Sure enough, Liam had jumped out of his pack-n-play and hit his head on the floor. I stayed in the room with him for an hour trying to calm him down and put him back to sleep but no avail. So, he just didn't have a nap that day. Later that evening he started getting delirious and was playing on the couch, jumping up and sliding off. Well, that ended with a face plant to floor and a minor bloody nose and busted lip. He wailed and wailed once again for bedtime and we just left him in there. Eventually he stopped crying and fell asleep (waking up a few time). When 2:30 am rolled around and Dylan and I were trading off Felicity duty, Liam woke up screaming with a full on bloody nose. Dylan cleaned him up and put him back to bed. Then again at 6:30 Liam woke up with another bloody nose. He looked like he got in a bar fight.

I wish that was the end of his drama but that just happened in a 24 hour period.

The saga continues.

Just a day of Eating Turkey

I found it very hard to say that I'm thankful for anything today. Of course I have things to be thankful for but there is an overpowering sense of loss that keeps me from being happy about anything. A year ago today was the last time my family was all together. Tessa and I had the brilliant idea of hosing our first Thanksgiving and we made everything from scratch. It was great and everything turned out delicious. If I had known then that it would be our last, I would have cherished every moment. It's just crazy to think that every passing day is another day further away from us being together.

Today I found myself grieving the loss of my children's grandfather. It all started this morning with a stupid retirement commercial that showed a man just playing with his grandkids and being so happy about spending time with them. My dad would have been a great grandfather and I'm so sad that my kids will never know him. He loved Liam and couldn't wait for him to be at an age where he could really play with him. It just sucks that our kids will have no memories with him and will only know him through stories or pictures.

Dad I wish you could see how crazy and rambunctious Liam is and how beautifully ethnic Felicity is. I can't believe you're not here and that they won't know you.

Yet I Will Praise

This song has been one that I have loved for about a decade now. It was one that I learned to play and even played it at church once in High School. Ironically, it resurfaced in my life and I have been wanting to sing it again. At the time I was concerned that I had no life experience to make this song authentic. Boy do I have it now. Unfortunately I can't really say the words reflect what is in my heart right now, but in time I hope they do. I can praise God for my father's life and all that He did through him, but I'm not able to praise Him for his death because I can't see the good that has come from it. At least not yet.

(Ignore the cheesy video, just listen to the song and read the words)


Yet I Will Praise - Vineyard

I will praise You Lord my God
Even in my brokenness
I will praise You Lord
I will praise You Lord my God
Even in my desperation
I will praise You Lord

And I can't understand
All that You allow
I just can't see the reason
But my life is in Your hands
And though I cannot see You
I choose to trust You

Even when my heart is torn I will praise You Lord
Even when I feel deserted I will praise You Lord
Even in my darkest valley I will praise You Lord
And when my world is shattered and it seems all hope is gone
Yet I will praise You Lord

I will trust You Lord my God
Even in my loneliness
I will trust You Lord
I will trust You Lord my God
Even when I cannot hear You
I will trust You Lord

And I will not forget
That You hung on a cross
Lord You bled and died for me
And if I have to suffer
I know that You've been there
And I know that You're here now

Even when my heart is torn I will trust You Lord
Even when I feel deserted I will trust You Lord
Even in my darkest valley I will trust You Lord
And when my world is shattered and it seems all hope is gone
Yet I will praise You Lord